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October 26, 2009

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Comments

Whitney Williams

I don't think it is right to tell someone or decide on who to marry based on one's race. I think the decision should be based on love and love only. You never know the person you could be looking for might be of another race than of your race. I really applaud that boy and girl who still got married and not let ignorant people get in the way of how they feel for each other.

Jacklyn Gion

Two years ago my best friend's mother (a white woman) married an African American man. I helped supervise and schedule the wedding, and it was probably one of the most gorgeous weddings I have ever seen. Watching the two families come together to celebrate such a beautiful union was breathtaking. Unfortunately, through out the town there were disapproving whispers and murmurs about the relationship, and it is such a shame. Most would automatically think that Americans have matured from racism, but with stories such as these, it is obvious that they have not.

Christine Regan

I dont think it should matter what color you are. If you are in love with someone then you should get married. Granted African Americans come from a different culture than White Americans so it could complicate the marriage. But if the two people are willing to work through their differences if shouldn't matter what color they are. I think its great that the couple didn't let someone's negative opinion of their lives affect their decision to get married.

James

I'm amazed how gentle the comments are in disagreeing with the judges decision.

As a Kiwi (New Zealander) these sorts of clearly ignorant decisions are totally unacceptable to most clear thinking people and, thankfully, almost all Kiwi's.

You just have to appose them! and I hope the judge suffered a suitable backlash.

I often deal with mixed marriages at my How To Get Your Ex Back blog, and I can tell you that black, white, mixed, and anything else, the challenges, and the decency of the participants are the same regardless of colour.

Paul McKinley

I agree! I think that society puts far too much emphasis on race. Sure, we say there is very little racism left, but actions like this sure make me wonder. What would he say to someone who has already married a person from another race? Would that marriage be wrong? There is no reason for us as Americans not to have this freedom, and it should not even be going against our culture.

Katie Diroff

I feel that this isn’t not right. Just because you are of a different race you can’t marry someone you love? The United States is supposed to be home of the free. If you can’t even marry someone you live, what’s the point? I also think it it’s a great thing that the couple didn’t let someone influence their opinion.

Brittany Kupersmith

I think that people should marry who they want to marry. Who cares about their race, they are human beings which is all that matters. They should make decisions for themselves.

Thadius

It really suprises me to see such a story considering how much our country holds pride in it's belief of Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness. You would think that, in this age, we would not see people's rights denied (especially by any level of the Government) based on something such as race. I must say that this I find it somewhat disturbing to see this story. It really makes me wonder about how many other U.S. government officials are out there who would behave similarly to Justice Bardwell.

Shae

"Bardwell said his refusal to marry the pair was not due to racism, but because of his concerns for children that the union might provide According to Bardwell, neither group accepts such children. "

I can't help but grimace at this circular logic: "I don't accept them because people don't accept them".

I saw a similar argument against gay marriage in which the person wanted to keep it illegal because "outcomes aren't good for children" in gay marriages. Huh. I wonder if that's because people like you keep those families illicit and those "outcomes" not good.

Victor Ovalle

It does not surprise me that this actually happened, i had to ask myself first if it did; and it sure did not. why? well, in my Intro to Sociology class this week we were just discussing the race issue and if is still is an issue in the United States today? and the answer is clearly yes. Just take a look on how long it took for a biracial (or what so many people refer to as African American) president to get to this position. I think that to all of us is more than clear, and if is not let me make it clear, that the problem why this Judge did not want to marry this couple was not for the sake of the children, but because of racial discrimination or less to say, race issues. Does it mean that every kid who has biracial parents is abnormal (for example, the president, as mentioned in the post)? Us, as a society, have to start realizing that racial issues still do exist and try to eliminate these problems.

black dating

I must say that this I find it somewhat disturbing to see this story. It really makes me wonder about how many other U.S. government officials are out there who would behave similarly to Justice Bardwell.

Mylene

I was born in other country. When I came here in U.S., I wondered why race discrimination exists including interracial marriage. I came to understand now that U.S. is country of Immigrants except American Indian. I was married to a white man and I am an Asian woman. I still love my ex-husband and I am still living with him.
Therefore, marriage is a bonding of a couple who is in-love with each other and no one can stop them from marriage. What Justice Bardwell did was absolutely discrimination.

kevin

I don't really care about the color of your skin or who you decide to marry. I believe that is the choice of the individuals involved and that is all that matters is their happiness. I come from a small southern town where everything is still segregated very much in a way, and its not just interracial marriage would bother a community like that, its a change in community, a change in the normal conditions of the culture. Its more of a fear in things changing than a hatred of peoples of a different race.

Brittany Posey

This does not surprise me at all. People in America want to act like racism does not exist and it is a reality that I have had close to my heart for a long time. Being in an interracial relationship has caused me to see and experience racism that is still alive and well in America. The funniest part is people who say they are not racist have a problem when their kids or someone in their family starts to date or marry interracially. Most people try to hide their racism until something hits close to home. This incident has probably happened many times and it is really unfortunate. People need to realize that ANY marriage regardless of race is going to have problems. Yes there might be some more problems for interracial marriages, but if two people want to be married who are you to say they cannot be? It is sad really and hopefully sometime in our lifetime people will begin to open their eyes and see past the color of peoples' skin.

Rhianna Lindsey

It's disturbing to see that "race" still matters. I would like to think that our society has become mature enough so that people can make choices regardless of the color of anyone's skin. Justice Bardwell had no right to make assumptions on behalf of the currently nonexistent children. This couple could be very caring and make wonderful parents. Plus, the law is, "Under our Constitution, the freedom to marry, or not marry, a person of another race resides with the individual and cannot be infringed by the state." Justice Bardwell should not have interfered.

Ada Janowicz

I believe that even the most racist people; even though they will never admit to it, know that not allowing people of different "races" to marry is simply ridiculous, pathetic and childish! What defines race Skin color? Where does skin color come from? It depends on the degree of melanin found in skin cells. So even the whitest of all rednecks is only different from a native African my amount of a hormone in their skin cells. I believe that the idea of race is simply close minded. I am not saying that all the people are the same and we should all love each other, but the amount of pigment in our skin should not be a determining factor in any aspect of society. People differ by their culture, education, manners, and sense of humor, abilities and talents. Those are the factors that determine which people should be together or not. However we do not need a judge to determine that, it comes natural. If I meet a man who, according to me, is nice, well mannered and intelligent I might marry him, and it makes no different whether he is white, black, or quarter Indian.

ashten

I also believe that people should marry whomever they feel is the "right" person for them, whether they are the same race or not, skin color shouldn't matter. My boyfriends mom, after getting divorced married an African American, and they are probably the happiest couple I have ever seen! They told me about all the looks they got in the beginning, but it just didn't matter to them, they were in love!

Michael R

I find it strange that people are in so much shock when they hear of a racist moment. I also find it strange that people don't realize that the justice of the peace is old so the new age anti racism which is becoming more widespread may not be instilled in him because of the way he was raised. I know this does not give him an excuse for refusing to marry these people especially in an elected position. Eventually with time these types of situations will die as more people learn why its wrong to judge people by the color of their skin. Time will change all of these things but considering he holds a public position racism should not be tolerated and he should loose his position. People deserve to marry who they wish to marry and they did the right thing by finding someone that will marry them. Things will change people just need to keep doing what they are doing and continue to point out the flaws with racism.

s.powell

I FIND IT VERY SAD THAT RACISM IS SO WIDELY "IGNORED" RACISM DOES EXIST! THE WORLD KNOWS OF THIS ISSUE, HOWEVER, ITS SOMETHING DISCUSSED IN THE PRIVACY OF HOMES, OR SPOKEN ONLY AMONGST FRIENDS WITH THE SAME VIEWS/VIEWPOINTS OF ONEANOTHER. THE US WAS FOUNDED BY AN "ELITIST" GROUP, WHOM MADE LAWS (AT THAT TIME) TO BENEFIT ONLY THEMSELVES AND OTHERS JUST LIKE THEM. REALITY: THE US WAS BUILT FOR THE MAJORITY, NOT THE MINORITY!

Nicole G.

I am also upset that racisim still exists. I think that it doesn't matter what the person you love looks like as long as you love each other and have IMPORTANT things in common like morals, beliefs, and values. I think the justice of peace was wrong to deny marrying them and no matter what he said he did it out of descrimination.

Abigail DeWitt

I think that, although the judge may have personal concerns with interracial marriage, he should not have imposed these concerns on this couple. I am dating a cuban guy, and i am white...should we NOT be allowed to get married just because we are of two different races? I also agree with what was said about how it is very difficult to distinguish race: he is cuban, but he also has, way back in his background, black relatives--does this mean that he is partly black? maybe it does, but when it comes to love and marriage, it really should not matter.

Michele Johnson

I feel like our society should be way past this belief of people of different races can not get married. Our society is so diversed and we need to be able to accept that. The government or anyone else has the right to tell someone they can not get married because of their race or the person they plan on marriaging.I agree with Inniss that race is majority of the time thought to be biological construct but it is also socially constructed. Race is based on physical criteria and is institutionalized. When it comes to marriage I think race should not have any kind of affect on a couple getting married or not.

JR Tillett

This story was blown entirely out of proportin! The justice has a right to either take part in marrying a couple or not marrying a couple. The justice claimed that he would not marry an interracial couple due to the fact that he feels the children would suffer based on his own previous experiences. Therefor he was not saying the couple could not get married and he did not attempt to somehow make sure the couple was never united at all. He simply turned this couple away because of his beliefs. He has a right to choose who he will and will not marry, just as the two individuals wanting to get married chose to date someone of a different race. If anyone would have actually followed this story themselves, rather than listen to the biased, liberal media they would have also seen that the justice did nothing wrong. END OF STORY! Th topic of race is overly sensitive in our country today. Get over it and move on.

Jessie B.

Unfortunately today our society is still using the 'one drop' rule meaning, if you have one drop of black blood than you classify as black. Why do we have such strict standards to be considered white? Eiher your pure white or your black? That doesnt make sense. I would think that by now we would have moved back these social constructs about race. I am bi-racial, my mother is white and my father is black. I have been able to see because of my parents marriage how often their interracial marriage comes up as an issue, even now. I can only hope that with the coming generations will be a new way of thinking when talking about race.

Dess

This whole ordeal is rather ridiculous. As long as the woman and man both consent to getting married and they love each other, there should be no problem.

"A child needs to be completely prepared to face racism. Categorization and racism pose a problem to a biracial child. Those who are racist thinkers need to place everyone into a category, but a biracial child does not fit neatly into a category. Racists may become more resentful and more racist towards these children, and these children may draw inordinate amounts of attention in situations in which the usual racial category system has no clear place for somebody who seems not to fit in one category or another."

"A second problem a biracial child may experience is that he/she could encounter an identity crisis because they embody two racial groups that are defined very differently in the category system of American racism. When the child is old enough to understand their identity, the parents need to step in and educate the child. This is not always easy for the parents who usually come from two completely different backgrounds. However, parents have concurred that it is absolutely essential that a biracial child have a clear and positive sense of identity."

"A third problem a biracial child may face is conflicts with their grandparents. At times grandparents may become very attached to the child and the biracial family will draw closer together. However, even though the grandparents are very attached to the child, at times the White grandparents historic views overcome them, and they will still keep their distance because of the fear they will get labeled for associating with a Black family. This resentment and distance of the grandparents leaves a lasting impression on the biracial child and how they are viewed by society."

"One last negative effect children receive because of their racial identify comes from their siblings. Some biracial children can pass as White while others can not. This can result in the whiter child receiving privileges society will deny to the darker skinned child. This will ultimately lead to resentment in the family and barriers to sibling closeness. On the other hand, the child who can pass as White may bring with them a lifetime of identity struggles, the unpleasantness of secret keeping, and personal and family pain arising from efforts to hide the existence of relatives of color."
(http://academic.udayton.edu/race/04needs/s98alouis.htm#Multiracial)

I can understand Justice Bardwell's concern, no one can deny that a child of an interracial marrige will have some psychological ordeals to overcome, but the situation as a whole seems to be more than concern. I believe that there is racism involved. It's sad that racism is still practiced in the modern world. I hope there comes a day that it will no longer be around.

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